


Seein' Red

by bi0nicbuckyb



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 16:59:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17328938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bi0nicbuckyb/pseuds/bi0nicbuckyb





	Seein' Red

“I don’t want you here anymore,” he’d said to you, anger flashing across his emerald eyes. You’d never seen him this mad, and you had no idea what brought on such anger. The next word spat out of his mouth like venom, leaving a wound that still stung to this day. “Leave.”

You remembered standing silently in the library of the Bunker, frozen in place, watching him take another swig of his whiskey. This place was your home; your only home. Leaving here would mean you had nowhere else to go, and you’d be on your own. The Winchesters were your only real family, and Dean was, without a doubt, the love of your life. 

The red mark on his forearm was like a beacon in the otherwise dark room, and you knew it was the reason he was acting this way. The fucking Mark of Cain. Sam wasn’t home, Cas wasn’t around, and there was no one to run to for help. Being brave, you stepped towards him, and his body posture changed, like a cornered animal. 

“Dean, I-”

“No,” he said flatly, taking the last swig of amber liquid out of the glass and setting it down so hard on the table it almost cracked. “You can’t talk your way out of this one, Y/N. What part of we don’t want you here anymore do you not get?” He flicked his tongue out over his bottom lip, to ensure he got every last drop of alcohol lingering there. You were getting pissed off now. “Get your shit… and go.”

“I think I deserve a better explanation than just get out, don’t you think? I mean for fuck’s sake Dean, I love you. Where will I go if I leave?”

“Not my problem,” he answered quickly, leaning back in his chair and putting his boots up on the table. Your heart stung as you realized he totally ignored your love for him. You squinted your eyes and stared at him for a few seconds, and realized he wasn’t the same man. He was changed, morphed into something evil and mean. With booze involved, he was worse. 

“So that’s it? You just don’t...love me anymore?” 

You could tell he was getting irritated, annoyed; like you were a fly he just wanted to swat away. He removed his boots from the table and got up quickly, closing the space between you in record time. You could smell the liquor on his breath, as he towered over you. This time, his eyes were locked onto yours. You froze once more, staring back. WIth no weapons and no way to defend yourself, your hands began to shake, but you stood your ground. You knew your Dean was still in there somewhere. He had to be. 

“I never loved you,” he whispered slowly, pinching your cheek as if you were an impotent child. Against your will, the tears started flowing down your cheeks now. Your pride stopped you from making any sounds, and you reached up to wipe the tears away. Dean’s face still showed no sign of remorse. “In fact, I hate you. Now get the fuck out of my face.”

“Fuck you,” you choked out, hating yourself for showing him your pain. “You fucking monster.”

Dean didn’t even flinch, reaching under the table to procure a bottle of beer he’d stashed there. He popped it open on the corner of the table and put his boots back up, resting with not a care in the world. You stormed away into your shared room and gathered all of your things into a duffle bag. It was the same duffle bag you arrived at the Bunker with, the day your entire life changed. 

Slinging it over your shoulder, you walked down the hallway you’d grown to love for the last time, kissing your fingers and placing them on the wall. 

“I’ll miss you most of all,” you whispered to the air. “Keep my boys safe.”

When you walked back through the library, you stood one more time in front of Dean. 

“I’m leaving now, just like you wanted. This is the last time you’ll ever see me. Is there anything you want to say?”

You stood in front of him, waiting for some kind of acknowledgment, but none came. He stared straight ahead, as if you didn’t exist. You felt your heart break into a thousand pieces in your chest, as if someone punched the wind right out of you. 

“Fine,” you said after a few moments of agonizing silence. “You don’t ever have to see me ever again.”

You walked to the door of the library, before stopping in it’s entrance and looking back at the man you loved more than there were stars in the sky. He was sick and needed help, but you were afraid of him. There was nothing you could do to help him, if he didn’t want to help himself. 

“Goodbye, Dean,” you said more to yourself than to him, as you exited the Bunker for the last time. 

\-----------------------------------

About two months had passed since the last time you saw Sam or Dean. Sam had tried to call you so many times it was becoming stalkerish, but you had no plans to ever see Dean again. You changed your number, and moved as far away as possible, in hopes that you never had to see the Winchesters ever again. You loved them so much, but you couldn’t handle seeing Dean act the way he’d been; the monster he’d become. 

Cas was the only one who found you. He showed up at the bar you were working at one day, in his usual trenchcoat and backwards tie. You could say it took you by surprise, but it really didn’t. He was an angel, and they were the best trackers around. 

“How did you find me?” you asked him, bringing him a glass of water. 

“That’s not important. Why did you leave? Sam and I were so worried about you.”

He looked at you with those stern, icy blue eyes. You knew he was concerned, and your heart melted for him. You took a seat in the booth across from him. Of course you noticed that he didn’t mention Dean’s name. Was that because he didn’t care, or Cas didn’t want to hurt you?

“Cas, it’s…. complicated.”

He continued to stare at you, waiting for you to continue. You breathed heavily out of your mouth.. 

“I mean, it’s not really that complicated. Dean wanted me to leave.”

“I find that very hard to believe.”

“Sam was gone and you weren’t there, Cas. You don’t know how he spoke to me. You don’t know the… evil I saw in his eyes. He was drunk, I was scared, and he told me to get the fuck out. I’d never seen him like that before.”

“It’s the Mark of Cain, Y/N. When he realized that you left he... got worse. He didn’t know what he’d done until he couldn’t find you. He’s not doing so well without you.”

“Well he can live with that forever, because I’m not going back there.” 

“And why not? Sam and I can keep you safe.”

“Because I’m not going to worry if he’ll kill me when you or Sam aren’t there, Cas! You can’t monitor me 24/7. I love him… but that’s no way to live.”

He sighed, pretending to take a sip of his water. 

“Fine, but I’m telling Sam where you are. Just for his own piece of mind. He hasn’t slept in weeks.”

Cas got up and began to walk away from the booth. You stepped in front of him, and his brow furrowed. 

“Promise me you won’t tell Sam or Dean where I am.”

“Y/N, they’re both so worried about you, I---”

“Promise me, Cas. Please…”

The angel pursed his lips and stared at you, mulling it over in his head. Finally, he spoke. 

“Okay, I… promise. But I can’t promise that they won’t find you themselves.” 

At his words, you hugged him tight, realizing right then how much you missed him too. He hugged you back, patting your shoulders awkwardly. This was the first time you’d ever hugged him. 

“Take care of yourself,” he said in his soft, deep voice, before walking out the front door into the night. You ran after him, just to get one last glimpse of your old life, just to make sure it had all been real, but he was gone. 

\----------------------------------

It was a normal day, well, as normal as it had been in the past few months. You weren’t used to doing an everyday job, and you were itching to go out and hunt. But you didn’t. It was risky to go alone, and you didn’t have the proper weapons to do so anyway. 

This particular day was slow, and your boss left you in charge of the bar; bartending and waitressing all at the same time. You were only one person, but it kept your mind occupied. It was a rare occurrence that you thought of Dean now, but your heart ached for him every second. The memory of that night and what he said to you played in your head like a broken record. 

You were wiping down a booth in the back corner, when a familiar voice made you almost jump out of your skin. 

“Excuse me, miss?” the deep, gravelly voice said, tapping you on the shoulder. “Can I get a whiskey on the rocks?”

You spun around, dropping your rag, your heart landing in the pit of your stomach. After all this time, there he was, standing in front of you as gorgeous as ever. The evil look in his eye was gone, but now it was like there was nothing there; a blank, empty slate. You didn’t know which scared you more. 

“Dean…” you breathed, smoothing out your apron. Half of you was excited he was here, alive. The other half was pissed, and wanted to punch him in the face. “W-What are you doing here?”

He smiled, and your body melted. His hair was longer, longer than you’d ever seen it. Something about him was off, but you couldn’t place it. 

“I was just… passing through. Thought I’d grab a drink. How’s my girl doing?”

Your blood boiled to a hot degree of one thousand. Clenching your hands into fists, you were really close to breaking his nose. 

“I’m not your girl, Dean Winchester, and I’d appreciate it if you left.”

Dean scoffed, a stupid smirk on his face. He licked his lips and shoved his hands in his pockets. 

“I’m not leaving until you talk to me.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Excuse me,” you quipped in a sing-song voice. “I forgot that you get everything you fucking want.”

“So you’ll talk to me?”

“No,” you answered flatly, picking up your rag and starting to clean off the rest of the tables. 

He stood there, watching you, his strong arms crossed over his even stronger chest. There was an aura about him now that wasn’t there before, something more unnatural. It made the hair on your arms rise, and yet him just being in your presence made you want to rip his clothes off. Your head was swimming with emotions. 

“Dean, look. If you don’t leave, I’m gonna tell my boss that you’re harassing me. He’ll call the cops, and I… don’t want him to. Just please leave.”

“Y/N, you know as well as anyone that I could take on any man in this bar. No one is calling the cops, and I’m not leaving.”

It was useless. When Dean made up his mind, there was no convincing him otherwise. It was you who sighed this time, tucking your rag back into your apron. You probably looked like hell, considering how hot it was in this bar, but his eyes were looking at you as if you were the only person in the room. 

“Fine. Sit at the bar, I’ll get you your drink, but leave me alone. I’m working, and I don’t need you getting me fired. I have no interest in talking to you, other than taking your drink order. Is that clear?”

Dean raised his large hands in defeat, before that stupid smirk spread across his perfect, dumb lips again. 

You practically stomped behind the bar and grabbed him his requested drink, before placing it in front of him angrily. 

“Here,” you spat. “That’ll be eight bucks…”

“Eight bucks?!” he cried, looking at how little you poured in the glass. “There’s barely anything--”

“Eight bucks or I take the drink,” you cut him off, holding out your hand impatiently. 

Dean slapped a ten dollar bill in your hand. 

“Keep the change.”

A few hours had passed and you avoided Dean completely. He asked for a few more drinks, but you cut him off after four, knowing how he got when he was drunk. He was wearing a long sleeve, maroon button-up shirt, so it was hard to tell if the Mark of Cain was still tainting his skin. The last thing you wanted him to do was cause a scene. 

“Bartender!” he yelled, as you were clearing off tables. “I’d like another, please.” 

“No, Dean. Enough.”

“Just one more?” he asked, putting on his best pouty face. It worked. Anything to shut him the fuck up. 

You poured him his drink and slid it down the bar to him. Suddenly, you felt a wave of anger course through you, and you needed some answers. 

“How did you find me anyway, huh?” you asked, poking a toothpick in his direction. 

“Sam put a tracker in your phone like… forever ago.”

“So why hasn’t Sam come before you?”

“Because you told Cas you didn’t want to come home. So he gave up.”

Fucking Cas…

The way Dean said home made your heart flutter. You missed the Bunker, missed Sam and Cas, missed your room and your bed; missed home. He could see it in your eyes. 

You walked away abruptly, not wanting Dean to see you cry. Suddenly, a man who came into the bar almost every night walked up to you, taking your shoulder in his hand. He was much taller than you, always drunk, and always hit on you. You were sure he meant well, and could usually fend him off, but now was not the time. His name was Jacob, and he was something the fuck else. 

“Hey pretty l-ladyyyy,” he crooned, his words slurred from alcohol he’d consumed at his first bar stop, before they kicked him out and he made his way here. “Is that guy over there bothering you?”

“No, Jacob. Please just let it go. Go sit at the bar and I’ll get you a drink.”

You tried to pull his hand off your shoulder, but he wasn’t letting go. You could feel Dean’s eyes boring into the back of your skull, knowing he was watching the entire scene play out with military precision. 

“Come on, lemme take you out,” Jacob whined. Your entire body was alight, knowing what was about to go down. You struggled to break free, wanting so badly to punch him in the balls, but he had your arm in a tight grip now. “When do you get off?”

“Jacob, please let go of my arm or I can’t stop what’s going to happen to you, okay? Just let me go and I’ll--”

But it was too late. Dean was next to you so fast, it was as if he had teleported next to you. His body was in attack mode, but his face was calm. Jacob finally let go when he saw him. 

“Who the fuck are you?” Jacob asked, spit flying out of his mouth in a drunken rage. 

“Are you touching my girl without her consent, Jacob?” Dean asked softly in succession. 

“She ain’t your girl, dude. She ain’t no one’s lady. Just a whore who fucks every guy in --”

And that was all it took. You watched Dean’s face contort into rage, watched his fist fly and connect with Jacob’s nose, watched his knee connect with his stomach, watched Jacob’s face smash off the edge of the bar. Blood and teeth flew everywhere, as Jacob collapsed on the floor in a heap. 

“Dean!” you screamed, crouching down to see if Jacob was still alive. “What the FUCK?”

The next few moments were an absolute whirlwind, your vision and hearing starting to wash out. Your boss came from behind the kitchen to tell you he’d called the cops, that you were fired, and to get the fuck out. You felt Dean’s strong hand take your arm gently and lead you outside, where you collapsed on the sidewalk. Breathing in and out, getting oxygen to your brain, your hearing and vision began to come back. 

“Damn, kid,” Dean said from behind you. “Tough break getting fired and all that. I’m really sorry.”

It was your turn to rage, so mad you were seeing red. You picked yourself up from the sidewalk, turned around, and pushed him hard in the chest; so hard he actually inched back a few steps. His face was one of surprise, and you were satisfied. 

“You’re sorry?” you spat, pushing him again. 

“I didn’t intend for that to happen--”

“Fuck you!” you screamed, with another push. “You threw me out like a dog, as if I meant nothing to you; as if you never even cared about me. And now, here you are, fucking up the life I had to create because you didn’t want me anymore!”

With one more push, you collapsed onto the sidewalk again, completely and utterly defeated. Not afraid for him to see you anymore, not even caring, you started to cry. Hot, fat tears rolled down your cheeks and neck, your entire body shaking with sadness. You’d kept this in for so long, just going about your day, but now you had no life; not the old one, or the new one. Both were Dean’s fault. 

You felt Dean scoop you up effortlessly under the knees, and he began to walk. Where he was taking you to, you didn’t care. Hopefully, to kill you; put you out of your misery. You could hear him softly shushing you like he used to when you were sad, but your eyes were closed, and you weren’t sure if that was your memory playing the happy times, or if he was really doing it now. 

About an hour so later, your eyelids fluttered open. Somehow, you had ended up in your own bed. You didn’t even remember falling asleep. How did you get here? Sitting up, you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes and looked around. The room was relatively dark, except for the light coming from your bathroom. Then you remembered - Dean. Had he brought you here? 

You got up and walked to the bathroom, your eyes still half closed. Pushing the door open, you jumped, seeing Dean staring at himself in the mirror. His eyes were pitch black, like the demons you’d helped him hunt. You screamed, quickly turning around and running out the door, closing it with a snap behind you. 

“Y/N!” he shouted, chasing after you, taking your wrists in his hands to control you. It wasn’t hard, but enough to stop you from moving. “Shhh, listen to me, please.”  
“Y-You’re a.. demon?!”

“It’s a long story…”

“Start fucking talking,” you spat, wrenching your wrists from his grasp. “Right now.”

Dean explained everything to you; about Metatron, about Crowley, about how he died. For the first time in a long time, he looked sad. 

“Does it balance you out?” you asked, instinctively reaching up and rubbing your thumb along the scruff that dusted his cheeks. You quickly pulled your hand away, realizing what you were doing. He wasn’t yours anymore. “Like… are you less angry?”

“No,” he answered truthfully. “If anything, I’m more angry now, but I can control it better.”

“How did you know where I live?”

He cleared his throat, biting his bottom lip. 

“Cas told me where you were and I’ve been...watching you. For a while. Just to make sure you were safe.”

There was a silence between you for what felt like forever but, in reality, was probably only a few seconds. You could feel his green eyes staring at you, and your palms started to sweat. He was a demon, and this was so wrong, but you wanted nothing more than to kiss him. 

“Did you really want me to leave?” you choked out, fresh tears starting to prick at your eyes. “Did you mean everything you said to me?”

Dean took your face in his hands and made you look at him. Demon or not, he was still so handsome it stopped your heart. 

“No,” he said softly, rubbing his thumb along your cheek now. “Not even a little bit. When you left I… lost all hope. I just didn’t care about anything. I’ll regret what I said to you forever, Y/N.”

“How can I trust you now? How can I help you, Dean? Please… let me help you,” you begged, taking your fingers and running them through his long hair, trailing them down to trace the crinkles by his eyes; your favorite part of him. 

“I love you,” he croaked out, his eyes closed as he leaned into your touch. “Isn’t that enough for right now?”

And honestly, it was. As if they were magnets, your lips crashed together, sparks flying between you like they never had before. His large hands were all over you, feeling every inch and curve of you he’d missed for so long. 

Your trembling fingers worked at the button of his shirt, helping him to shrug it off his shoulders. Raking your fingernails along his forearms, you watched his eyes close and his teeth grit. He took your bottom lip in his mouth, sucking on it gently. You could feel he was on the brink of wanting to make love to you, and fucking your brains out.   
“I don’t care what you do,” you whispered in his ear, watching his jaw clench. “I want it all.”

At your words, Dean scooped you up and laid you down on your bed, ridding you entirely of your clothes, until you were completely naked in front of him. He speckled kisses from your forehead, all the way down to your thighs, leaving hot spots across your skin, your hands tangled in his hair. You watched as he rid himself of his own clothes, tossing them aside. 

“Jesus…” you whispered, taking him in. He was a god among men, so sculpted and perfect in literally every way. His long, hard cock was standing at complete attention, just for you. Your mouth was salivating. “Who knew a demon could be so attractive?”

“There is no one in the world,” he started, leaning down to kiss your lips softly, before peppering kisses down your stomach. “As attractive, and tasty as you.”

Suddenly, his lips and tongue were on your clit, suckling and lapping at your most sensitive spot. Your back arched violently off the bed, pleasure coursing through your entire body. It was bliss, his mouth. No one ever made you feel as good as Dean. 

Propping yourself up on your elbows, you watched him with hungry eyes. He looked up at you and smirked, the vibrations of his chuckle causing your eyes to flutter shut for a brief second. His plump lips wrapped around your clit perfectly, sucking with just the right amount of pressure, flicking his wet tongue over the sensitive bundle of nerves. Knowing what you love, he slowly pushed one, thick digit inside of you, letting your walls clench around it. 

“Still so tight for me,” he crooned, rubbing his thumb over your clit, as he worked his finger in and out of you at a torturous pace. “You love when I tease you, don’t you?”

“Yes…” you breathed, your nipples aching from being so hard. Dean reached up and tweaked the left between his fingers, before putting his mouth back onto your clit. You were so close to the edge, and he could feel it. 

“Cum for me,” he coaxed, his voice raspy and gravelly, making goosebumps rise on your skin. “I wanna taste it. Lemme hear you, sweetheart…”

Every fiber in your body came undone at his words, and you let go; your orgasm rocking through you in delicious waves. He bent his finger inside you ever so slightly, letting you ride it out. 

You got up on your knees quickly, wanting so badly to taste him. He caught your hands. 

“I want this to be about you,” he said with a deep swallow. You watched his Adam’s apple bob. “I need to make up for what I’ve done to you.”

He laid you back down and kissed you fiercely, with everything he had. You watched as he pumped his cock in his hand, watched the sweet bead of precum you were desperate to lick appear at the tip. 

“Please,” you all but begged. “Just let me touch you. I want to…”

Dean let you take his cock in his hand, moving it back and forth in your palm. He was so hard, you could feel it pulsing. Looking up, you watched his eyes become hooded before closing, his breathing labored, before his eyes flashed back. Dean caught himself and looked away from you. 

“It’s okay,” you whispered, moving your hand faster now. “I love you no matter what.”

Dean moved your hands and laid you back down, guiding the head of his cock to your soaking wet entrance. Slowly, he pushed himself inside, filling you up, just how you liked it. His mouth connected with yours again, and this time your hands worked their way over his shoulders, arms and back. You could feel the muscles working under your palms as he thrusted, giving you everything he had. Sweat from his forehead dripped onto your chest, as he fucked you into the mattress. It was no longer love making, it was now raw, primal pleasure; something you were both craving. 

“I missed you so much,” he groaned, thrusting completely out and plunging back in. “Fuck, this feels so good.”

There were no words spoken between you for the next couple minutes, as you brought each other closer and closer. Only moans and groans of ecstasy filled the room. Your eyes remained locked on one another, both of you afraid the other would disappear. 

“Dean,” you choked out. “Cum with me.”

With one last thrust, as the head of his cock brushed against your g-spot, you both came hard. Dean’s eyes turned pitch black and he shot his seed deep inside you, and you didn’t even care. This was the man you loved, no matter what form he was in, and you would never leave him again. You held each other as you came down from your orgasm, both of your legs trembling from the impact. 

Dean layed you down in front of him, with his cock still inside you, brushing the hair away from your neck. He placed several kisses there and down your collarbone, his breathing still labored. 

“I love you so much, Y/N,” he breathed softly in your ear. “Go to sleep now, sweetheart…”

And you drifted off into a dreamless sleep. 

\------------

You awoke the next morning feeling empty. Reaching over to see if Dean was still in your bed, you found he was not. Your heart sank into your stomach, exploding like an atomic bomb. Wanting to cry, you got up from the bed, wrapped yourself in your robe, and grabbed your phone. You called the one person you knew would listen. 

“Sam…” you said softly, hearing his voice for the first time in months. “Is Dean there?”

“Uh… no, Y/N, he’s not. Was he with you?”

“Last night, but he’s gone now.” 

“Did he tell you he was a --”

“Demon, yes.”

“He hasn’t been here since he… left with Crowley. I’ve been trying to find him. I think Cas and I found a cure.”

“A cure? Will it work?”

“I don’t know, but we have to try.”

You breathed out a deep sigh and ran your fingers through your tangled hair. 

“Sam, come pick me up. I want to come home. I need to help you fix my husband.”

“Tell me where you are. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”


End file.
